The honest answer is: there are no ‘best ways’ to vent your anger.
Because venting your anger can cause you all sorts of spiritual, emotional, mental and physical health issues and problems.
Spiritually – angry people can do and often do commit some of the most terrible crimes in the world, including murder and child abuse.
Emotionally and mentally – angry people find it very difficult to maintain healthy, loving and caring relationships. People either keep their distance, scared to get caught in an angry person’s outburst or rage fit, OR stay around and put up with being regularly bullied, criticised and blamed by the angry person.
Even when the angry person is successfully keeping their anger under wraps, people can still feel that they’re angry (this is the underlying component of passive-aggressive behaviour, where a person pretends they aren’t angry, but then indulges in all sorts of ‘bating’ and neglectful behaviour to ‘get back’ at other people.)
If they’re not successful at keeping their anger under wraps, angry people will hurt and alienate their nearest and dearest time and again, even without meaning to.
(As a sidepoint, uncontrolled anger is often one of the key diagnostic points in personality disorders including Borderline Personality Disorder, and Anti-Social Behaviour Personality Disorder.)
Emotionally, feeling anger is a very uncomfortable and negative state for the angry person to experience themselves, and can lead to some huge amounts of stress and frustration. Think of all the ‘angry’ people we see who didn’t get their mocha latte served to them exactly how they wanted, or who get stuck in a traffic jam, or who’s cake didn’t turn out as planned.
Angry people are frequently very miserable.
Physically: Anger has been directly linked to a number of physical issues, like heart problems, digestive issues and insomnia.
So, ‘venting anger’ is not a good thing, by and large. BUT – we still have to deal with, and acknowledge, our angry feelings, because we all still have them, and just trying to ignore them or repress them can cause even more havoc to our emotional and physical health and wellbeing.
In the next post, we'll discuss some strategies for how to deal with anger in a healthy way.