One of the things that causes us human beings a great deal of emotional and spiritual pain is when we have a relationship with someone we love or care for, that ends up going very sour.
Sometimes, this happens because we change or the other person changes and the two ‘halves’ just don’t fit together as a good whole anymore. Other times, the person hasn’t changed at all - but we suddenly wake up and realize that what we thought was normal, OK, or standard behavior from the
other person actually really wasn’t at all, and was doing us a lot of damage all along.
Whatever the reason for the relationship going sour, or being revealed as being negative, there’s always a lot of fall-out to deal with. On the one hand, there are still tender feelings, warm memories and some sort of hope that the warmth and kindness that either truly was there, or that was erroneously believed to be there, can be recaptured. On the other hand, there’s often a pressing need for us to now protect us from this negative person, and the negative vibes they’re sending our way, as much as possible.
Trying to keep these competing interests satisfied can drive even the most stable person a little insane, especially when you the relationship in question concerns close family members.
That’s where the following visualization exercise comes in very handy, as it enables us to express and ‘protect’ our warm feelings, while at the same time being able to come to terms with, and if necessary complete distance ourselves from, the now negative and damaging relationship.
So without any further ado, here it is:
As with all visualisations, you can learn a great deal about what’s really going on with your relationships by doing this. If things are really over, this exercise can help you to clear up any related lingering and conflicting sub-conscious issues, and deal with your feelings appropriately.
If you get stuck at any time, ask God, or one of your favorite spiritual figures, like Rebbe Nachman, for example, for help.